How much should I share online?

I have always loved creating content, multi-tasking, and getting as much use out of something as possible, so why not translate that to the rest of my life? However how much should I share online and why it may not be the best idea to be as honest as my online presence namesake.

Collage of photos of father daughter

There are plenty of things I can talk and create about, and part of this translates into why I started this blog way back in 2016 (I think!) when my Dad got diagnosed with Dementia. It was a way for me to create something from such a sad situation that I hope could bring value or use to others. I really hadn’t had a chance to see what I was getting myself in for, and there wasn’t much at the time online I could compare myself with. But also selfishly, it was a way for me to cope with what was happening, make it something practical I can focus on, whether it be his current care needs, or writing up our experience for myself to read in years to come or someone else to sympathise with.

I would wrestle then with how much to share, and with someone who no longer has the capacity to agree to have their experience and pictures posted online was a moral dilemma for me. Ultimately I am so glad I did, being in the middle of it is very fight or flight and there is so much I would and have easily forgotten if it wasn’t for the fact I recorded it. I now have pictures, voice notes, and writing I can look back on. If only I had been so diligent when he was well, memories are a fickle thing and easily forgotten and not to be relied on sadly.

We are now 3 years later, his gravestone still isn’t on the grave though, (big thanks to red tape on that one!) and everything about my life has changed. I still have the issue of Dementia being very close to my heart even though I am more distanced from the community now, I have no doubt in the future it will come back to influence me again.

dog lying on the towpath
Beautiful lying on the towpath while I made my new roof decking

Now living on the boat and the lifestyle that comes with that is so curious to so many, with blogs, vlogs, and events all shaped around this community, I would love to share more of that lifestyle. And if we meet in person I certainly will, such as friends, family, or passer by at a lock, I am always happy to answer questions. However, we have a few obstacles to sharing online which come back to the themes of oversharing and safety.

Oversharing I am clearly very good at hence the blog, but at what point should I shelter myself sharing all the sordid details of my life for the internet to catalog and log away for anyone’s prying eyes? Some revelations I am more happy to share, one being my ADHD diagnosis which I am thankful I managed on the NHS in a relatively short time, and it has helped me understand myself and how I function so much more, giving me the freedom and insights I never knew I needed. It seems in the media there is a lot of hate toward people, (especially women getting a late-stage diagnosis like myself) around the topic, but I think everyone needs to calm down and get some empathy, ok!!

Oversharing when it comes to boat life would be showing the more realistic sides, and not the super tidy boat tours, but the reality of living in a small space with spiders, lack of storage, dirt and a dog, Would people judge me for that, I am sure they would. Do I care enough about judgment, perhaps not, still doesn’t mean I should be sharing my days-old dishes for everyones ‘entertainment’. Boaters love to talk about toilets and what you do with waste, just be glad you can’t smell through technology yet if I was to share those experiences haha.

narrowboat kitchen galley view of working from home
View into my galley kitchen on a normal enough day

In correlation with my ADHD, if I don’t do something straight away, it doesn’t get done, end off. I have so many unfinished blog posts and videos, but I now understand (more) why I am like this, and it’s something I just work with. The issue here is, with me sharing boat content exactly when I do it, that means that anyone could come and find me on the canal with pretty good accuracy. I already see other boaters’ posts and within a frame I know where they are mooring in London, and with that level of detail it feels dangerous to share that. Nothing bad has happened yet, and God forbid it won’t, but just like I haven’t been pickpocketed in London yet, still doesn’t mean I should walk about with my wallet and phone and keys outstretched for someone to grab.

Furthermore, I am currently unemployed and taking the time to slow down and figure out what I want to do with myself. With this change of pace, I have more headspace now which has led to me doing more of even the simplest of things for myself that didn’t happen previously, such as enjoying cooking a healthy meal, doing an actual skincare routine, and having the headspace to battle big questions and thoughts I have. Part of this new freedom has made me realize how much I love to share and write my feeling in this space, and now I have the time you may just see more of me. But I will try and refrain from the gory details, and keep the content privacy focused where possible. If you have read this and don’t follow me on insta, that’s where the good stuff is usually dropped, otherwise catch you next time!

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